I wonder...

What do we bring when we come here?
Except the pounding heart that cleanses the blood
and the soul that nourishes the thoughts that flood
and the flesh that grows with the years passing
and the spark of life that exists until there is meaning.

What do we take when we go there?
Except the warmth of our final sleep,
And the few tears shed on us as they weep,
And the prayers and chants said in our name,
Tell me, do we take money, wealth or fame?

In truth what do we feel and do when we are alive?
Suspect intentions of people we meet,
Not wanting to return a kind word or greet
Bitter quarrels which are finally pointless,
making oursleves appear cold and heartless.

And I wonder what we feel and do when we die?
Feel sorry for everything said and done?
Or earn some punishment from The One?
Or muse if our whole life was wrong or right?
Or sleep our eternal slumber nice and tight?

The Quest

It has just sunk into me that we do not talk
I cannot look into your eyes for they mock
Give me a reason for my mind to stay free
Till then it is a hard heart that I see
Sometimes when I am in a half slumber
halfway between mind and heart - I linger
My mind enforces the truth behind our parting
while the heart steadily refuses to see reasoning
But what am I holding on to? Why are my hopes new?
When I know that ironically our memories are few
But some of those moments still linger within
I see no reason but madness trying to win
I am tortured to no end to understand your mind
I am dying to know why you left me behind
But someone who talks from inside my head
holds me back from questioning you instead
Let me see if my true love survives the test of time
be it minutes of silent words, be it hours of vacant passing,
be it days of empty thoughts, be it years of mindless wanderings
I will wait to see if the quest to love suceeds the language of silence
or if the sultans of ego are crowned triumphant in the end

Lost Love

Time keeps moving but men keep waiting
some wait for lost thoughts some wait for lost money and others for lost things
But Thoughts may come back when memory revived
Money may come again with luck and fortune
Lost things are bought again to replace...
But most men wait for something
something that was a thing of the past
something that was once pure, once adorned, once cherished...
something that was once called Love
something that they could not replace...
Once lost, it is a thing that is rarely remembered
it is sometimes forgotten as time weaves her web
or sometimes shut down in the reccesses of the mind
or worst still sometimes denied by an inner force

But a few unexpected things unearth the forgotten past
A song loved by both or a flower's fragrance that reminds
thoughts of the special face on a moonlight night
floods back the memories of that past lover
drowning us in sweet pain that accompanies lost love
That which was once lost seems almost near at hand
the inner force that denied turns into inner peace
the fragrance opens the recesses where secrets hide
the song sweeps away times intricate web...
Until lost love's enemy intervenes
Reality...
And then, Time keeps standing still, but then men move on...


pic courtesy : http://library.lhs.usd497.org/Becca%20Raynes.jpg

The Walk

Together we had walked once,

Holding hands on the road of life...

Now I walk alone,

As I watch your lonely walk ahead...

Isolation stares at me,

Urging me to find solace in her.

But she also walks with you

From the moment you left me behind.

And then I stopped walking,

And stood alone,

Watching the fading twilight

Wondering if we could walk together again.

It was then that you turned back

To face the old road where I stood still,

Waiting and watching……

And when our eyes met,

Isolation vanished...tracing her path back to her abode,

Then we walked again…

But this time though we both walked alone,

It was a better walk than the one before...

For neither of us had Isolation for company

But shared a new companion – Hope,

Who sat at the point where we would meet again,

As we walked towards each other.


Written with Pushkala Menon

Seasons Change...

We met one autumn morn

As the leaves unfurled woken up by dew

And the wind blew softly on us as we held hands

Feeling blessed to have found new company

We came closer on a springtime noon

Speaking softly the language of heavens

Under blossomed trees that showered upon us

Its blessings in form of flowers that we loved

We became inseparable one summer eve

As the red Sun bid farewell

Dipping its tired head into the sea

On whose shore we stood holding each other

We said Goodbye that winter’s night

As frost fell and the fire of our love died

Leaving us cold, unloved and miserable

Feeling cursed as the darkness enveloped...

Darkness

I was born and raised in darkness
as time flew I saw darkness everywhere
the cold darkness of feeling unloved
the darkness of fear as I walk alone
darkness of the human mind when betrayed
darkness of the people who break bonds
the darkness that slips quietly while you sleep
terrible darkness that makes misery when awake
it's something 'bout darkness of this world
that I muse as I die; that darkness engulfing me

The Alley

I walked up high mountains to a deep valley

musing at the verisimilitude they bore to reality

Down the hills I went and sat on a tuft of grass

The beauty I beheld before me was alluring

The fir trees bowed to the wind enduring

and upon the slopes I saw little clouds pass

I stole silently past the spongy wanderers

crossing brooks, streams and blithe meanders

into the sleepy hamlet nestled in the valley

The hamlet had its church ringing bells so merry

the children danced and played games a many

I walked on not stopping until I spoted a dark alley

I stepped into the silent street my feet staggering

and in panic I cried seeing nebulous forms floating

tried in vain to turn back again...But I vaporised

I seemed to drift through unhappiness and tears

I was mixed with ghouls, ghosts and fears

what place is this I shivered, my mind terrorised

It was then a light appeared in luminous sharpness

chasing and battling with the piercing darkness

It carried me far far away, where to rest I lay

The light of hope said, the dark alley is a vault

of errs of human nature that makes conscience revolt

in the valley of life such an alley always will stay

It is in despair and sadness, hope will you amaze

Search for the light even in the darkest days

So you wake up everytime with a smiling grace

As Lonely as the Lighthouse

The Remains of a Dream

I woke up from that long strange dream

And my slumber was not as real as it seemed
There was an Agent of hatred in the nightmare

who held hands with the Queen of Passion

Together chaos and conflict ripped the very soul

Of a being that was being devoured whole

With the screams and agony of the cursed being

rang the unsung songs of love haunting

Is it a sin to love and not be loved the being cried

But in the end even the whimpers of agony died

And the beasts of malice and vice stood laughing

As the being drenched in blood lay writhing

There was a fleeting moment of seeing a face

Someone I had not seen for many days

Searched I did - calling out loud

for the face I had once loved

Instead I heard increasing jeer and laughter

My body jerked as my heart beat faster
't was then I woke up from the strange long dream

And my slumber was not as real as it seemed

I looked into the mirror and saw the poor being

I shook myself to disbelieve what I was seeing

Slowly the lips parted in a smile for ‘it was just a dream’

But the smile had forever left the eyes

In them instead reflected the secrets of my past

The love, the devotion and the madness

As I looked deeper into my eyes I gasped

for from deep within smiled the once loved face again

But now it was like someone I had seen never before

It was just a ghost from the days that had worn

But then why the dream, the long strange dream? I mused

It struck me then...that I should have known!

All remains in the sea are always washed ashore

The Road to Kent

Trot trot the horses went,
down to a place called Kent.
'twas a cold winter's day at dawn,
She sat lonely and forlorn;
The carriage moved swiftly towards Kent,
Trot trot the horses went.

Just around a bend in the road,
stood a shepherd with his goad.
She saw that he had a leg missing,
Pity! Her heart beat took a missing,
Seeing at the bend in the road,
the one legged with his goad.

She tossed a coin at the urchin.
It fell down and he bent down searching,
He lost his balance the poor lame boy
and went crashing down like a toy.
All for the toss of a coin to the urchin
who had bent down for searchin'

Hark! The man driving had heard.
She rushed out to help the shepherd.
But so shocked was she to find,
her kindly assistance being declined.
The man driving had this heard
the refusal of help by the shepherd

Is it madness that you possess!
cried the enraged witness
A lady's help you refuse so eager
then why pick the coin you beggar?
Is it madness you possess?
roared the enraged witness

Be not harsh! said the lady fair,
Come hither boy! It is so rare!
To want a coin but not my help,
It does not good to yourself.
Tell me why? asked the lady fair,
Coins but not my help! 'Tis so rare.

My Lady said the poor shepherd boy,
Lady, Money makes life so cloy.
I bent down to pick your lost penny,
Never thought it be charity money.
My Lady said the simple boy,
Money makes life so cloy.

I refused your help to be stood on ground,
For it is like being lost and only once found;
For once fallen and taken help
would practise me every fall to cry and yelp;
I refused your assist to be stood on ground,
For it is like being lost and only once found.

If I get money and assistance today,
What will the morrow have to say?
One needs to learn to fend for oneself,
I vowed never to habit to pity myself;
If I get money and assistance today,
What will the morrow have to say?

Saying so the shepherd walked away,
tending his flock on its way.
The lady and her driver stood astound;
Shamed were they at the ken newfound.
Watching the shepherd walk away,
tending his flock on its way.

She went into her cushions again,
Thinking of the boy's boon and bane.
Man is not what he has but what he is;
This my mind should never miss
sitting amidst her cushions again,
she mused about the boon and bane.

Trot trot the horses went,
on their way to Kent.
'Cried I have at such things small
but I have been blessed all along'
Trot trot the horses went,
with the wise lady on her way to Kent.